lindseybluth:

i hate spotify ads because i listen to playlists in the shower a lot and there is nothing more startling than being completely naked and suddenly hearing lebron james say “i’ll tell you what makes me thirsty”

reading in head: i'm practically a master of linguistics my pronunciations are perfect beyond compare
reading aloud: *chokes on spit*

vinebox:

worst pain imaginable

emoij:

Look what Danny devito just posted

emoij:

Look what Danny devito just posted

EPIC LIFE HACK *MUST READ!*

quagmath:

Sometimes i pick the grass from my neighbors yerd and put it in my own so i? the grass greener oh the other side? No anymore

krudman:

Can I offer you a nice egg in this trying holiday?

krudman:

Can I offer you a nice egg in this trying holiday?